After another glorious year of crazy college shenanigans, moving home for the summer can, at first, seem dreadfully unimaginable. No parties? No pint night? No hot frat dudes walking around in Chubbies and bro tanks with muscly biceps gawk at? UGH.

Alas, there are ways to survive this summer. Although we may be back to midnight curfews and morning quarrels with Mom and Dad, we’re also back to bountiful fridges, free wifi, and enough free time to finally finish knitting that scarf you started three years ago and just rediscovered in the back of your closet. 

Then again, it’s bikini season. That scarf can wait till Winter – what simply cannot wait is hopping on the “Rockin’ Summer Bod” train. AND, making sure all your friends are jumping on it alongside you.

Luckily, I,  your humble servant, have provided for you the perfect recipe for the sweetest, freshest, and healthiest tasting juice on the planet. Fo real. It’s bound to impress your houseguests at that summer pool party, or gulp up before heading out for a run in the morning. I call it Beetle Juice. Pun intended.  





  • 1 big red beet
  • 1 cucumber
  • 2 limes
  • 1 Granny Smith apple
  • 1 tbsp minced ginger


  1. First, round up your friends.
  2. Now, round up your ingredients. 
  3. Take a pic. You’re hosting this party, and everyone is going to want to have digital documentation of it. Just be the courteous, millennial host you are, and snap a shot. Or snap-a-chat. Either option produces the same result.
  4. 1 Save. Add filter. Post to Slide. 
  5. Slide, for those of you non-trendsetters who don’t know, is the newborn child (metaphorically speaking) of Snapchat and Instagram. Your pictures post to a feed of people who are near you. Unlike Insta (with its unspoken rules, predicating how often you should post), Slide is made for a multi-post-a-day user. Instead of wasting your phone battery sending that one group photo to everyone in it, you post to Slide’s feed, which is easily accessible to anyone within a couple hundred feet of you. No followers, no following, no dead battery.
  6. After you’ve posted the first five pics, you can cut your veggies up. Your juicer WILL break if you overwork it! It’s like a little baby bird, just be a good mama and pre-chew its food for it. 2
  1. 3Now comes the fun part: throw everything in the juicer and applaud the magical elixir it spits out. 
  2. Take another pic. Post to Slide. Prepare to amaze.
  3. Pour your beet-le juice into a cute glass. I obviously chose a blue mason jar, because, duh, we’re being trendy.
  4. Throw a garnish & cute patterned straw into the mix for added effect. 
  5. This juice is made to be enjoyed in the summer sun. Go outside and relax. Sit in the grass, dip your feet in the water, enjoy some good company, and some beetiful juice.
  6. But don’t forget to get it all on Slide! There is no shame in going completely out of your way to find some grass to set your glass on, to take at least 10 pics until you perfect the “cute factor”, and to make sure you provide a caption that includes a good pun. Punny captions are the #1 way to achieve social media (and overall life) success.    


Beet myself up juicing today, but the final product couldn’t have been beeter!












Selfie. Post to slide. And enjoy your freshly made, beetifully colored, crazily healthful, beet-kini body ready juice!

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